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मेरा जीवन दर्पण

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तुम सिर्फ प्रेमिका नहीं मेरा जीवन दर्पण हो,
तुम पत्नी, पूरक, श्रद्धा और जीवन दर्शन हो |

The Three Winning Strategies

Dear Friends,

In my presentations, I keep talking about 3 winning strategies; Power of Observation, Desire of Execution and Art of Persuasion. I have already promised to some of my friends to elaborate my idea on it, and here I am trying to keep my words.

Since my childhood I have been listening from my elders or I have been reading in books that “Experience is the best teacher”. In a way, this statement has an in-depth meaning, and has got a valuable truth as well but I never found it aligned with my idea of a Best Teacher. I tried to analyze and then I realized there is even a better teacher within us, and that is not the Experience, but I called it Observation, which comes (for me) before Experience. Experience as a general concept comprises knowledge of or skill in some thing or some event gained through involvement in or exposure to that thing or event (The history of the word experience aligns it closely with the concept of experiment). I found that there is one ingredient that plays a major role in placing the phenomenon of ‘Experience is the best Teacher’, and that ingredient is ‘Time’. It has been assumed that if one experience something as the time passes, that persons can gain expertise. This never sounded good to me (I mean you all can have a different way to explain it but still it did not sound good to me). I think Observation is more appropriate and precise word, to replace the word ‘Experience’ and to make it look like ‘Observation is the best teacher’. If we do not observe then the experience means nothing, on the contrary, in this case if there is person who is so called Experienced Person, is as good as a blind person, sitting near window seat, passing through a beautiful road, without noticing a single thing out of it.

Thus, we can see that Observation is either an activity of a living being (such as a human), consisting of receiving knowledge of the outside world through the senses, or the recording of data using scientific instruments. Observation is the process of filtering sensory information through the thought process. Input is received via hearing, sight, smell, taste, or touch and then analyzed through either rational or irrational thought.

The more observing we are, we will be productive in a better way. To prove that we have been traditionally giving more importance to Observation than the Experience, I would like to take you to one of our Mythological story of the King Parikshit, who was cursed to be killed by a snake-bite. In his last days, he wished to listen Srimad Bhagvatam before he dies, and for that reason he started looking for some great scholar across the universe that can chant the verses and make him understand the essence of it. That time lot many Rishis, Mahirishis and Brahmarshis were there but the King chose just 16 year old Shukdev ji to help him. We can see (or we can observe…) that for him, the Experienced Scholar did not matter but what mattered is that Intelligence that came to Shukdev by Observation in a very short age. When I tell you this, I do not mean that Experience has nothing to do with Quality output, but rather I want to say that Experience without Observation is nothing at all. Observation is more important than anything, first Observe it as deeply and as closely you can and then you go to next level. It goes without saying that Observation is completed only when our brain get into touch with any stimulus and effects our minds, otherwise it’s not observation but just another piece of experience. The importance of Observation has been accepted by many western scholars and thinkers, e.g. "Observe always that everything is the result of a change, and get used to thinking that there is nothing Nature loves so well as to change existing forms and to make new ones like them." Meditations. iv. 36. - Marcus Aurelius

To activate our ‘Power of Observation’, two things are required. First, we must shut-up. That's right, stop talking - both to yourself (in your mind) and to others. When our mouth is closed, our ears and eyes magically open wider.

The second step is to gather verbal and non-verbal information without thinking about it. This is easier said than done, but can be mastered with practice.

There are lots of benefits of an enhanced Observation skill, for example we can have a better understanding of friends and rivals, good and bad, can improve our decision making skills, we can learn a better way to help people, we can learn how to influence others, finding new ways to solve persistent problems and last but not the least, seeing Opportunities and Problems before they happen. With benefits like these it's no surprise that confidence and self belief improve too.

One of the strangest things about being a human is the way we have to unconsciously ignore most of the information available to our senses. And because of this nature, the ‘Power of Observation’ becomes very relevant and important for us.

After practicing ‘Power of Observation’, we need to move towards the next level, which can help us win the battle. Yes, I am talking about the ‘Desire of Execution’. ‘Desire of Execution’ is second most important factor. To accomplish anything, there has to be a strong desire, driven and motivated from within because this desire only will decide how far we can travel, how much of hardship we can take, to fetch our wagon beyond stars.

A strong ‘Desire of Execution’ is when you don’t just sit back and worry that how will you reach your goal, whether you will reach your goal or not but rather you keep working on it. This ‘Desire of Execution’, for me, works as fuel to sail through any problem and reach my destination. I would like to quote here the example of our own former CTO and present CEO Mr. N. Chandrasekaran. Nobody would ever think that certain people could run a marathon. If the person desired to run it, but never did anything about it, then it would never happen. If the person focused on execution, then that person would start to run every day. First that person would run 1 mile a day. Then the person would increase that to 2 miles a day. Gradually the person would increase the difficulty until they reached 26.2 miles. This is because that person focused on execution, with a very strong desire of doing it. And that is what our CEO did, by finishing the Marathon.

There are millions of people on our planet, who wish to be rich or have some similar very high ambitions. Sometimes, they even think also that how they can be what they wish to be. But they lack in this strong ‘Desire of Execution’, they don’t have this fuel to help them. They consistently do not think of new ideas, and constantly pitching those new ideas and trying to create some value out of it. Are they…? Of course not, and that is why I like one of most successful innovators Mr Disney’s statement that ‘‘Get a good idea and stay with it. Do it, and work at it until it's done right’.

So, the next time you think of a new goal, consider whether or not you are acting with ‘Desire of Execution’. Don’t just sit around but wake up, don’t stop till you reach your goal.

Now, let’s move towards the third and final winning strategy i.e. ‘Art of Persuasion’. Here also I would like tell you a small story. My grandfather used to tell me one story in my childhood. The story was about Lord Krishna and Maryada Purushottam Ram. It goes like this: Once all the Gods and goddesses had a meeting headed by Lord Brahma, to decide between Rama and Krishna, who deserve to be worshiped as God and who is not. Everybody started working on it to come up the final decision. And then it was decided that Krishna will be worshiped by the world as God and not the Rama. Someone asked – why is it like that? Then Lord Brahma answered. To be a complete soul, to be a God, one needs to have all the 16 Gunas (16 traits of personality). Ram is having only 14 Gunas and thus he is a perfect Man that is why he will be respected as Maryada Purushottam (Respectful and perfect among all Men). On the other side, Krishna possess total of 16 Gunas, 2 Gunas more than Rama, that is why he deserves to be worshipped as the God. And those Gunas are, when asked he answered: first is Krishna knows how to dance and second is he also knows how to make other dance. As I grew up I heard similar stories from other sources as well. I started thinking over it again and again. I found that actually those 2 Gunas that Krishna had with him, are nothing but ‘Art of Persuasion’ – if we put it together. Yes, that is what the ‘Art of Persuasion’ is all about. You can understand it in various ways. For example, if someone is good in communication skill, he is supposed to speak well, but at the same time he is supposed to be a great listener as well. If I want to make my thought understood by someone, I have to understand his/her words as well. This is what Krishna was having – he dances and makes others also dance with him. This ‘Art of Persuasion’ is something that can lead you to success if you have it. You just need to learn how to pursue something, with your 100% of heart. Once you have learnt this art, you can sell ideas, you can still sell Desktops, you can sell computer architectures, software - in short from paper pin to airplane anything you can play with the way you want to.

You just need to know and practices carefully few things in your life – the things that can help you to be an Expert of this Art. I have mentioned above Mr. Disney's statment ("Get a good idea..."). What did he mean when said this, what does this statement refer to…? Within this statement, he also talked about this ‘Art of Persuasion’ indirectly that get an good idea, stay with, and keep pursuing it with you full heart, dedication and passion, and don’t quit until you get it done. Let’s try to find out couple of practices that we ought to bring into our daily life and see how it changes our whole world:

1) Speak only those words that sound good if spoken to you

We should always try to put ourselves in the other’s shoes (if we really care to know where it’s pinching) and understand the situation from their point of view. Set aside your personal interests and concentrate on them. Ask yourself if you are them, what would you do? What would be your opinion? Then take the appropriate action that would be beneficial to them.

2) Try to behave the way other one is behaving

People feel comfortable with those who are like them. Copy the person you are trying to create a connection with. Observe how they act, how they speak, and how they think. If they rub their forehead while they think, act like them. If they speak at a clear and slow pace, try to do the same thing. This is called mirroring. In due time, the people you’re mirroring will subconsciously feel more comfortable with you. It’s as if they see themselves in you. Proceed with caution, however. Do not let them be aware that you are copying them. They might interpret it as mockery and you’ll just get into trouble.

3) Accept all the people as they are, and be cheerful and nice to them

Our parents were always right when they taught us to be nice and gentle to all. People like others who brighten up their day. Make a sincere compliment to raise their spirits. Little things like these go a long way to breaking the ice and setting the relationship off to a good start.

4) Walk the talk, and show your sincerity and trustworthiness

Make them feel that whenever they need help or just someone to look up to; you’ll always be there to lend a hand. People tend to be more receptive to those they trust. If you have a boss or client you are trying to please, over deliver and exceed their expectations. Soon, they will notice your efforts and will be more than glad to grant your request.

5) Express effectively and provide them with all compelling evidence

Explain to them how your ideas or suggestions could be the most effective techniques to implement. Show them undeniable proof that you have the best product by way of testimonials, before and after scenarios, and detailed comparisons against your competitors. Just make sure that all your claims are true and verifiable. Always maintain a good reputation.

6) Personalize the content being delivered or to be delivered

This is the most important thing to remember when persuading anyone. People are self-centered. They always put their own well-being before others.

No matter how close you are to becoming like them or how overwhelming your evidence is, if it does not satisfy the "What’s in it for me?" test, your persuasion efforts will not produce satisfactory results. If you can prove that your proposal will provide more advantageous benefits to them than to you, they are more likely to accept it.

7) Walk the way of ‘Servant Leadership’ and make them feel that you really care for them

Focus more on their interests, desires, needs, and expectations, so you can satisfy their craving for attention, and establish mutual trust and respect. It also shows that you really care about them and that will make them more likely to trust you and want to work with you.

Dear Team! These are couple of things, that I had in my mind and thought share with you all because we never know what can be helpful to someone at what point of time and I also believe that we should all let the noble thoughts come to us from every side. The three winning strategies that I have tried to elaborate, have come from own observation. You also might have observed something similar to this. I don’t claim that this is the only way to be successful; rather I strongly believe we all can have different ways to reach our Goals but the ideas that I have been talking about are the soul of any success mantra, which is, if practiced, going to make a difference for sure. How we are going to implement these 3 winning strategies in our daily life may differ, depending upon our personalities, because Personality is ‘dynamic’ organization of individual’s psycho-physical characteristics that determine his/her unique adjustments with his/her environment. So, your environment and your characteristics will definitely play an important role when it comes to apply the above explained fundamentals. What I can say is that all the very best for all your true efforts and may you all be effective in your lives.

With loads of positive energy, I am looking forward to hear about your thoughts/comments on this piece of article.

Thank you.

Regards,

Dilip K. Pandey

A Point of View: Spirituality and Religion

A visitor to Orkut Community - Divine Flames, raised a question, that I thought to share with you all...

"Dear dilip,

Can you pls differentiate between one being a religious & one being a Spiritual?

Are they cross-linked?

I am in a dilemma because i think most us want to be spiritual, & we choose the path of religion to take us to that spiritual infinity.........But it is following this religion which infuses fanaticism & rather than making us spiritual, it leads to possessiveness towards one particular sect & hatred towards all other......

I believe it is root cause of most of the problems we are facing today.......Thousands are being slaughtered in the name of religion, sect & language....while everyone is trying to be spiritual through these actions!!!!!!!!!!

So don't you think it's time to look beyond the horizons of religion & become spiritual in real sense? "

and I tried to answer his queries this way:

Hi Friend!

Thank you for visiting the community and posting a query. The question you have raised is very relevant, and for most of us this concept is somewhat misunderstood. We really need to understand the details of being religious and spiritual. There are indeed differences between the two. Why I am saying because one can be Spiritual but not religious at all. Spirituality, what I think is a state of mind, that reflects through our behaviors and shows up that the individual has attained a position wherein he/she is contributing either less to the entropy (a doctrine of inevitable social decline and degeneration) or not at all contributing to the entropy. They have less selfishness, are less materialistic or not materialistic at all. I believe anybody, who understand what to do and what not to do, who understand the benefits of being fearless, or who understand what can bound their actions and what can make them feel free, or someone who understands that all souls in this universe are actually one, and one is into all, is in a way Spiritual.

He/she is also spiritual who thinks his/her life is not just for himself/herself but for many other souls in this universe and thus they must optimize their senses for betterment of mankind, help one another understanding the meaning of being a Human, such actions are manifestation of Spirituality. But, at the same time I would like to confirm that all religions (in its most commonly (mis)understood definitions) try to base their teachings on Spirituality. Spirituality comes under religion's subject matter. Now, I would not like to discuss here upon what I think about religion or what a religion should be good at, but being religious might help you being spiritual (not always). Today, whatever the slaughter is happening is not at all religious. That is more than 100% wrongly spread stuff by some particular misguided souls. Religion never teaches to kill rather it teaches to protect. It teaches Peace but it also recommends to revolt if it is required to preserve the Peace for humanity. So, to conclude, I would say if you really understand the true essence of your religion or your way of spirituality, nothing matters for you and you will be good to man kind. I hope that I have tried to answer your queries. You can continue if this text has raised some more doubts in your mind, I would like to put my thoughts on same.

May the Force be with you.
With loads of love n' wishes,
Dilip

P.S.: Post is open for your comments.